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Find You On My Knees

Find You On My Knees by Kari Jobe

Troubles chasing me again,
Breaking down my best defence,
I’m looking, God, I’m looking for you
Weary just won’t let me rest and fear is filling up my head.
I’m longing, God I’m longing for you

But I will find you in the place I’m in, find you when I’m at my end,
Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness.
You lift me up, you’ll never leave me thirsty,
When I am weak, when I am lost and searching
I’ll find you on my knees.

So what if sorrow shakes my faith,
What if heartache still remains,
I’ll trust you, my god I’ll trust you.
‘Cause You are faithful and

I will find you in the place I’m in, find you when I’m at my end,
Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness.
You lift me up, you’ll never leave me thirsty,
When I am weak, when I am lost and searching
I’ll find you on my knees, my knees.

When my hope is gone, when the fear is strong
When the pain is real, when it’s hard to heal
When my faith is shaken and my heart is broken and my joy is stolen, God I know that

You lift me up, you’ll never leave me thirsty,

Find you in the place I’m in, find you when I’m at my end,
Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness.
You lift me up, you’ll never leave me thirsty,
When I am weak, when I am lost and searching
I’ll find you on my knees.

I find that this song is yet another one that really strikes me.  It is a good description of me where I am at, and as well something I wish I had more of.  I wish I could describe beyond that, but even the words I woud find would not suit what is inside of me.  My hope is jsut that I find myself on my knees begging for aide from Heaven above, open to knowing what it is when it comes.

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Posted by on September 29, 2012 in Inner Reflection, Inspirational Music

 

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God is Wiser, God is Stronger

Yesterday I posted a song that appeared in my Facebook ads and really struck me.  It was not too long after that roaming around on Facebook through statuses and photos that I found something else that struck me just as much as that video.  What made it more interesting is who I found it from, but that I shall keep to my own.  Let’s just say it made me smile.  Anyways, I came across this and just all of a sudden stopped.  I could not stop reading it over and over.

“For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.”  1 Corinthians 1:25

Something just really strikes me, hits me inside, about that phrase.  We can be as wise as ever and are strong as ever, but even then does God’s foolishness and weakness amount to more than our wisdom and strength.  It sure puts a spin on things, doesn’t it?  It doesn’t matter how on top of our game we are and how well off we are, God still is above us in His lowest point (not that God has many of those I would imagine).

So why does this strike me?  I can think I have things handled and sometimes even feel like I know what is best.  At times, I am doing really well and maybe I lose track of who is keeping me there.  This is a reminder of how important God should be in my life.  Sure, it reminds me of even more than that, but simply put…I can never outdo God or live without Him.  Why then, do I constantly try to do things without Him or think that doing what He would want me to do is not the best option?  Why do I try to run the show?  I have been learning the hard way that it only causes more pain and trouble than I may already have in my life.  Sometimes that is not enough to push me either, so then you bring in the friends who reinforce the point.

This bible passage is something I need to keep meditating on to put me back in check with what my life should really be about.  How about you?

 
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Posted by on September 7, 2012 in Inner Reflection

 

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A Place In My Heart

As one may notice, I don;t blog as often as I used to.  Perhaps I am not as inspired, or the enthusiasm for finding something to write about is missing.  It is not that I have nothing to write about, for I have a world of things I could share.  So it can still be wondered why not write more?  Most of what floods my mind, my heart, my soul, and my entire being is too personal to share with the open world.  One day perhaps.  That being said, I do have a little something for you to munch on.

I have been wishing that a song would cross my path that would give cause for some reflection, and something to share here.  The problem is, I really have only been listening to music in the car nice and loud to drown out the rest of the world inside of me.  At home, I get un-excited to listen to my iPod.  Maybe it could be the fact that there are songs there that can snap me back to reality and all the good things there for me if I put my trust in the right place.  Regardless, I was looking at the annoying ads on the right hand column of the Facebook screen and say a YouTube video and clicked on it.  This is the song that started to play.

Wow, right?  It is called “A Place in my Heart” and it is by Irvin Evans.  To me, a not-so well-known name in the Christian music world, yet appears on my ads at one of the many times that I need it the most when usually nothing comes up anywhere (that I have seen because you know, God has a million blessings everywhere and we miss them).  Strange, don’t you think?

At first, it was purely the music itself, aside from all the words, that drew me in.  This would play as a beautiful instrumental music.  Then, as I listened to the words, it feels like the hidden prayer in my heart.  As I have learned, and still see to be learning, I can’t just pray for things and hope they happen and that I will instantly heal.  I need to give something and make room in my heart for what I am being given.  This song has brought me to shed tears that I avoid letting go on a normal basis.

I want to pray this type of prayer fervently, but God, I need Your help to even talk to you.  Even to talk to Mary, Mother of all, I find myself struggling.  Let this song you have given me sink it and open my heart more and more.  I can’t do this alone.  Please fill all the places of my heart.  Amen.

 
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Posted by on September 6, 2012 in Inner Reflection, Inspirational Music

 

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All I Want to Do

Upon leaving the formation program with the sisters, most of my life had this feeling of falling apart.  Deep down I still have that draw to only live my life for God.  I was given a list of things I need to do while away from the sisters, for I am able to return one day when I reach a certain goals put out for me.  When having to live my life doing things my heart is not in, it becomes difficult to stay standing and do what I must do.  In the end of the day I just need to remember and hold close to the fact that all I want to do is live my life for God.  What will I do to make sure that it keeps happening, that I don’t forget what is most important and that I hold on to what God wants of me?

 
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Posted by on August 27, 2012 in Inner Reflection, Inspirational Music

 

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Faith

Yesterday evening I went to an evening retreat to kick off the Year of Faith with Regnum Christi.  I was invited by someone who saw me going to mass everyday and happened to walk out of mass at the same time as me.  There was a speaker, Lucy Honner, who I found very interesting as she spoke about faith and what the Holy Father says about it.  I even got some notes from it!  She took the word ‘faith’ and broke it to five different sections on what faith must be.  I will share with you what I came back with.  The notes were chicken scratch…perhaps they will make sense to you!

F – Firm Foundation

Faith the rock of my life.

Faith my guiding principle.

Don’t just know and believe in Jesus, believe in His message.

Read Hebrews 11.

Actions of faith must be done with more intent.

Be and sustain.

Faith must become firmer and stronger.

A – Alive and Active

Faith is not passive and for ourselves only.

Gift from God, share and proclaim.

Faith evolves and grows, we must maintain it.

Keep the faith real.

Must leave an impression to others of my witness of faith.

I – Informed

Need exact knowledge of the faith.

Don’t be satisfied with limited information.

Pay attention to the content of our faith.

Remain up to date with realities of faith.

It is hard work, it costs, but opens outr minds.

receive and integrate.

T – Tested and Trialed

Faith is a gift to us, but we will be tested.

Can’t just make faith happen with good intent and good deeds.

Acceptance of ordinary things.

Embracing persecutions.

Read James 1.

Letting go, open to grace.

H – Heroic

Must be a hero of the faith.

World needs witnesses.

Be unafraid to stand up and stand out.

Risk and sacrifice own life knowing God’s presence and that He has a plan.

Faith is assurance of things hoped for.

Often times can be uncomfortable.

Be heroic in the way we pray.

Be heroic in ordinary ways.

Be heroic in relationships with others.

Be heroic in humility.

Be heroic in forgiveness.

Be heroic in the way we are called to serve.

Our creed is a summons and a charge to us.  It is like a national anthem

I hope you can find something that strikes your being in these notes.  I know they are not the best, but it is more than I usually get.  For reading on the Year of Faith, check out the Pope’s Apostolic Letter on the Year of Faith.  It will be good reading I am sure!

So, is your faith as strong and informed as it could be?  What will you do in this year of faith to strengthen yourself in our Lord?

 
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Posted by on August 24, 2012 in Inner Reflection, Retreat Experience

 

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Riddle of Prayer Asking

There are moments in life where one really does not want to ask for the prayers of another not matter what, but those happen to be the moments when one needs them the most.  Even when one asks, one can still feel very alone and very gone.  Then one has to think, one would feel that way if one did not ask for prayers instead.  In the end, it can’t hurt for one to ask another for prayers, even if one technically did not ask but merely implied.

 
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Posted by on August 14, 2012 in Inner Reflection

 

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Simply Pray

People always say pray hard, pray like you have never prayed before.  Why not simply pray?  Sometimes one is not able to do anything but simply pray in the face of what is going on in their lives, especially in those heartbroken moments.  Even that can be a struggle.  Prayer is special, different for each person, that conversation with God.  Why not simply pray?

 
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Posted by on May 28, 2012 in Inner Reflection

 

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